Missions: Weakness Revealed
by cjalyssa
Summary: Series of Drabbles where Sasuke finds the dobe's weakness on their missions, Yaoi, SasuNaru,
1. Mission: Cemetery

**Disclaimer:** they are not mine _–pout-_

**Warning:** a stupid stupid drabble

**Mission: Cemetery **

_Who would have thought that the dobe is afraid of the cemetery?_ The onyx eyed boy thought gleefully as he watched the blond looking around with frightened eyes.

"Sasuke-teme, why the hell are we here?" the boy asked is a hushed whisper, trying to hide, but failing miserably, the trembling on his voice.

The raven-haired boy smirked a little when the blond boy unconsciously stepped closer to him. "Because we are on a mission dobe," he answered voice as impassive as ever though his insides are on turmoil from being too close on the object of his affection. Not to mention amused, on finding out a weak spot on the invincible Kyuubi.

They were assigned on a mission on a midnight at the middle of a cemetery. An eerily quiet and deserted cemetery. Where trees are thick and no moonbeams passed through, making the place pitch dark.

Sakura and Kakashi were gone to find clues for their mission and disappeared on the darkness. Hence, the two of them are alone.

A sudden rustling of the leaves made the normally loud boy squeak, clutching his rival's clothes in fear.

"Why, dobe? Afraid of the dark? I've never would have thought." The Uchiha said mockingly, eyes twinkling.

Cerulean eyes widen at that statement, and the blond was about to deny it vehemently when--

"Naruto!" Sakura screamed, suddenly appearing out of nowhere.

"Eep!" scared out of his wits, Naruto jumps in shock.

Oh yes, the dobe certainly is afraid of the cemetery. The shaking body on the arms of Sasuke says it all.

**--------------------------------------------Owari-----------------------------------------------**


	2. Mission: Gay Bar

**Note: _-_**_Sigh-,_ you people, **Mission: Cemetery** was just supposed to be a one-shot you know, but since you asked for a sequel… here it is, I just hope you like it.

And oh yeah, they're around 17 here…

**Warning:** a stupid, stupid drabble

**Mission: Gay Bar**

_Who would have thought that the dobe would actually feel queasy on a gay bar?_ The onyx eyed boy thought gleefully, as he watched the blond boy squirm on his seat when a guy wearing only a leather briefs dance in front of him.

"S-sasuke-teme, w-why are we here again?" Naruto stuttered leaning unconsciously closer to his rival, and then gulped when the man started rubbing himself on him.

"We're here because of a mission, dobe," he answered impassively as he could, though his insides are churning because of jealousy. But he is amused nonetheless, knowing that the Kyuubi container is actually uncomfortable on seeing a man dancing playfully in front of him, complete with erotic poses and seductive hips swaying.

Team 7 are in fact in a mission on finding an A class killer that usually hangs out in a gay bar. But Sakura had already passed out the minute she saw a stripping man on the stage, and Kakashi reluctantly brought her on their hotel room, grumbling about 'girls' low tolerance on raging hormones'. Hence, the two of them are alone.

The bar that they were in is actually an exclusive bar but they have managed to infiltrate it. The place is filled with old women, guys who swing either ways or just plain homo. Some are making out on the dark area of the room while the others are looking at them with amusement and lust.

Who wouldn't? After all the two of them is a sight to behold. He wore tight blue shirt and dark jeans with chains on the pockets and a choker while the dobe wears a hanging sleeveless shirt that shows his muscular body and deep navel and hip hugging tight leather pants. Not to mention his golden hair that falls on his beautiful face, and a fang dangling on his left ear. And that blue eyes of his that looks uncertainly around the place.

_He really looks hot_, the Uchiha thought, licking his lips discreetly.

Hoots and whistles and catcalls are then heard on the bar when the man seductively winked at Naruto then rubbed himself again at the teen.

"Sasuke-teme, lets get out of here," Naruto asks looking at the still dancing man.

"Why, dobe? Scared of a dancer? I've never would have thought," he mocked, loving the play of emotions on the blond's face through the spot light.

Cerulean eyes widen at that statement, he opened his mouth to deny it vehemently when he saw from the corner of his eyes the dancer is **taking his briefs off**!

"Eep!" shocked, Naruto jumps off from his seat.

Oh yes, the dobe is certainly queasy on the gay bar. But Sasuke isn't the one to complain, after all, he really like the feeling of a shaking Naruto on his arms…

**---------------------------------------OWARI------------------------------------------**

_What do you think people? Should I write another sequel??_


	3. Mission: Poultry Farm

**Disclaimer:** Naruto is not mine _–pout-_

**Note:** I'm glad many of you like **Mission: Gay Bar**, I'm so happy really. And thanks for all those who reviewed it. I made this longer so it's no longer a drabble but a ficlet. This is for you guys, _-grins-._

**Warning:** a stupid, stupid ficlet

**Mission: Poultry Farm**

_Who would have thought that the dobe is afraid of geese?_ The onyx-eyed teen thought as he saw the blond run frantically to catch a white goose only to step back hastily when the two-legged animal turned and run toward him.

"Sasuke-teme, why the hell are we doing this?" Naruto puffed, clearly tired in playing catch with the goose. Though, who's the **'it'** will always remain a mystery.

"Because this is our mission, dobe," the ravenhaired boy answered impassively, throwing the goose he was holding on a cage then latching the lock. He hides an amused smirk on finding out that the oh-so-strong-and-oh-so-invincible-yet-oh-shit-so-molestable Kyuubi container is wary to be near a goose.

Team 7, though all high ranking Shinobes now, is given a menial mission by the Gondaime, that since they have just been on an A class mission (the Gay bar), they should take a break. From the high ranking missions not from the missions itself, mind.

The idiot blond after hearing that a chuunin like him is supposed to help caging the animals on a poultry and transfer them to another poultry, had gone berserk and engaged in a shouting spree with Hokage on her office on that same evening. It has been a frightening night, seeing the table overturned, papers flying everywhere, ink flooding, flunged curses, head bashing, chairs crashing into windows and falling into a poor villager that just happen to be passing on a wrong place at a wrong time, and ear drums breaking because of the piercing scream coming from the window. The Uchiha has been slightly amazed that a guy could scream like that; maybe the man has been hurt too much.

After being beaten senseless, the blond relented, albeit reluctantly. So at 5 am in the morning they all gathered at the bridge and head to the poultry farm, they just left a note for Kakashi to follow them since they want to finish the embarrassing task as fast as possible.

The poultry had been vast and beautifully accentuated by the rising sun. Trees crowded the left part of the land where a barbed wire fenced the area. The cages are on the right side while the owner's house is at the North, though a bit farther. Over all place looked like a setting from a classic movie (NOT PORN!). They grudgingly admitted that this mission wouldn't be so bad after all.

Their sensei arrived, 6 hours late, claiming that he lost in the road of life when he went to the bridge then was lost again when he followed them here. As a result from their annoyance they let Kakashi do the dirty work, which is cleaning the crap-filled wooden cages. The masked Jounin however, after cleaning only a cage and a half said something along the lines of 'Oh! I forgot! The new volume of Icha Icha is out today! I'll go back later, k?' then with a puff of smoke he was gone to who knows where.

And then Sakura seeing a chance to escape, said that she'll go home to get some lunch for them and before they could answer, she was off running. Hence the two of them, Naruto and him, are alone.

Truth to be told, the dobe is more of a hindrance on this mission than a help. The blond had already spent three hours just to catch a single goose he caught one earlier but he was so damn afraid he didn't held it properly, that's why it flew from his hands making him squeak (the Uchiha had to bite his lips so hard so as to prevent himself from laughing his ass off). And until now he hadn't manage to catch it.

Taking pity for his panting teammate he walked purposely to the still running goose and scooped it swiftly with his left hand. He throws it nonchalantly on the other cage before locking it inside. The geese had all been caged now.

Naruto obviously relieved that the torturous part is over, threw a spiteful glare at the geese then walked away, muttering 'I hate this damned mission'.

"Why, dobe? Scare of a geese, I've never would have thought," the Uchiha mocked, following the blond who stopped on his tracks.

Cerulean eyes had widened at that statement and was about to deny it vehemently, when he saw one cage have overturned. It landed on the other cages efficiently breaking them. He watched wide eyed as the geese are freed again and they began flying, running, flocking and **goddamit!** the accursed birds are **heading** towards them!

"Eep!" terrified out of his wits Naruto jumps up in shock.

Oh yes, the dobe is certainly wary to be near on the geese, the shaking body on the arms of Sasuke says it all. Not to mention the muffled sobs on his neck and the trembling hands that clutched his shirt.

**-----------------------------------------Owari--------------------------------------------------------**

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:::::: _Here's for the peeps that is not contented with the short and accursed ficlet_:::::::

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**Omake**

After several minutes of carrying the sobbing dobe on his arms, the Uchiha decided to leave the flocking geese for a while and jumps off into the nearest branch of the tree, still carrying Naruto bridal style.

On the tree, he looked down into the teen's sunkissed hair and asked tenderly "Are you Ok, dobe?" Silently berating himself for thinking perverted thoughts. Well don't blame him, isn't he allowed to think arousing scenes when a delicious dobe who is practically draped on him and breathing heavily on his neck?

A small nod was all the answer he received.

Hugging the blond closer to his chest, he placed his forehead on top of the dobe's head. "Why are you afraid of the geese Naruto?" he asked seriously.

"I'm not; I just don't like their beaks, same as the ostriches and turkeys. I don't want them coming close to me, they might peck me," a choked voice answered.

He sighed heavily because of the pathetic excuse. Who in their sane mind would be afraid of the beak of an ostrich, or a turkey, or a goose?

_Wait a minute…_

_Beaks..??_

_**Heaven forbid!!**_

_Does this mean..? _

"Dobe, your not scared of chickens too are you?" Sasuke asked incredulously.

A hard jab on his ribs confirmed that yes, the dobe is afraid of chickens as well.

**8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888**

Hey don't roll your eyes on my storyline!

This fic has a stable background that a person can be afraid of these animals, you know…

What's my proof?

Uhmm..

Ahhh….

…_-shuffles foot-_

Hmm…

GoddamititsbecauseI'mfuckingafraidofthoseaccursedchickenstoo!!

_-blushes beet red from embarrassment-_

Well, even though it turns out too sweet, Hope you like it,. If not, _-scratches head_- it's up to you, just don't make my fic go en flambé ok?

Comments please! JA!


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